It's not just for students anymore....

Follow me while I follow my husband to the Midwest and try to navigate the "Partner" world at one of US News and World Report's Top 5 MBA Programs in the country.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

“Honey, I’m (Still!) Home!”

So, it’s actually a weird day for me to write this post, as Cam is out of town and not at home, but in order for me to move forward with future posts, this one needs to happen!


Before we came to Chicago for business school, everyone was constantly telling me how busy Cam was going to be. Parties, classes, homework, internships – I was never going to see him. I didn’t attend Booth’s Admit Weekend with Cam (I’d been to Chicago, and I just didn’t feel like it), but friends here who went say they heard the same thing over and over: Say goodbye to your husband/partner. One girl I know even said she left one of the panels in tears because she was convinced she and her husband weren’t going to see each other for 2 years!


Did these people work before they followed (I use the term loosely) their students here? Did the students work? Or were they just sitting next to each other all day every day holding hands and snuggling? If that were the case, then yes, I’d say the amount of time you see each other when one of you is a business school student would be unacceptable.


Let’s compare schedules.


Pre-business school (and I’m going to use Cam’s last job in PE – if I did this based on his consulting schedule, it would be way less “together” time):


Monday-Friday

7:00am: I get up

7:30am: Cam gets up (except on Mondays when he got up at 6am)

8:00am: I leave for work

8:10am: Cam leaves for work

5:00pm: I leave work

5:15pm: I go to the gym

6:00pm: I watch some show I’ve DVR’d

6:45pm: I start making dinner

7:45pm: I finish making dinner

8-8:30pm: Cam comes home

11:00pm: We go to bed


Together time = 3.5-4 hours


Business School (keeping in mind that we live in Hyde Park right near the school)


Monday-Friday

6:00am: Cam gets up to let puppy out and then goes back to bed

6:55am: I get up

7:55am: I leave for work

8:15am: Cam gets up

12:00pm: Cam eats lunch

1:00pm: Cam goes to class (three times a week)

4:30pm: Cam comes home

4:30pm: Cam goes to study group (on days when he doesn’t have class)

5:00pm: I leave work

5:30pm: Cam gets back from study group if he had one

6:00pm: I get home

6:30pm: We make dinner

7:30pm: We eat dinner

8:00pm: Maybe Cam reads while we watch American Idol

11:00pm: We go to bed


Together time = 5-5.5 hours/average


Obviously, there are times when this is different. There are weeks when he’s gone a few nights a week at “recruiting” events or Lunch and Learns or a club meeting. There are times when I’m gone trying to plan Partner’s Group events or at book club. But on the whole, we see each other 10-13 hours MORE a week than we did before! And you’ll notice, of course, the things left out of my schedule: gym and tv. I will talk much more about that later.


So, partners everywhere: don’t flip out! Married/committed students say no to the occasional night out or party, but neither of you are going to miss out on much. He/she will get the full student experience, and your relationship isn’t going to fall apart. Just make sure you really like each other because there is no escaping your better half once business school begins.

2 comments:

  1. I'm totally jealous. I'm a law school widow (widower?), and it's pretty crazy... no American Idol for us. I also work full-time as a GMAT tutor, and I always assumed that my students' partners were about to become two-year widows as well. Thanks for the great post.

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  2. What I've learned from watching partners at Darden is that the more the partners are involved, the better it is. Meaning, the student goes to a party, the partner comes too and makes their own friends within the student community. That way, in the future, BOTH people receive event invites. I still don't understand partners that are in the city, but never join the students. We're nice people, I swear! ;)

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